DO you have a family that never see your dreams? DO you have a family that is unsupportive and see you as an eternal child? Can you imagine you can’t call your mother and have a heart to heart talk because she has had years of depression and if she ends up in the hospital again family will “blame” you for sharing your burdens with of all people your mom..Imagine your grandmother, always reading the bible and when you call and say you have a problem she tells you you will go to hell? Imagine your brother is a big guy like a wrestler and he will forever be your little brother, he is 11 months younger than you, but he can not count money or tie his shoes, he cries easily? That is my brother. Imagine your uncle a sweet, stubborn man who won’t forgive people, that if you ever pissed him off he will never speak to you again. You watch as cousins get disowned by the same man you have loved all your life, he won’t listen, he won’t forgive. This is my uncle.My family is this way and I love them, but I feel so lost when I can not talk to them. If I do talk they run and tell people in the family I have no contact with complete “stories” about me and when I get home to Kentucky people veiw me like the lady with a bag on her face..I try to stay upbeat, I try not to cry when I get a letter from my mom saying how “ashamed” she is that I would consider ever leaving my realationship and try to find a new life. No one in my family ever says, “Honey, what is in your heart?” They don’t ask. It is all the same, talking around, talking over..if they talk too its to tell you how “wrong” you are about your life and you just want to cry. Sometimes, I want to put myself up for adoption. I wonder who would want me. I don’t fit in with my family, I am creative and witty and they look at me as if I am a strange bird from an unknown planet. When I was a little girl, my mom used to smile at me when I wrapped myself up in a curtian and pretended to be a princess. NOW, when I put on my Marilyn Monroe wig and sing for my kids she looked down as if she wanted me locked away in a wacky ward.I would love to hear your stories of feeling as if you “don’t belong” with your kin folk like me margo