It had been a great love and Serephina had loved Yazid with a great tender passion. He had left her lying under the cabanna somewhere in the Sahara. His lean fingers on her cheeks his dark brown eyes staring into her blue ones.

“Don’t leave me..” She whispered sweat forming on her delicate alabastor forehead.

“I’ll be back for you, my men are here , they will protect you.” His sensual lips searched out hers and they kissed.

Hours later she was alone in a villa overlooking the sea. She was longing for the love of Yazid, he was so much a part of her, but she felt like she would never fully possess him. He didn’t speak much sometimes she blamed it on the language difference his arabic-english ratio was still Arabic in the forefront. They spoke in other ways though and she never loved anyone like him.

The fact that he had left her at the cabanna had unnerved her. She didn’t want him away from her. As soon as he left the men who were suppossed to protect her came and tried to be her heroes. she was afraid. They feared Yazid’s fists and stayed away, but their eyes told her she was in danger.She was a foreigner in his land, they had met in South africa and had exchanged glances. He seemed shy but she had seen him laughing with his friends outside and knew he wasn’t that shy.

She had came outside in the hot summer air wearing a dark blue evening gown looking like an angel with black hair and blue eyes she smiled at him and he was quiet. He was tall 6’4 with dark eyes and black wavy hair.She smiled at him. “Is it always so beautiful out here?” He smiled back. “yeah.” He walked towards her and she pulled her shawl near her. “My name is Serafina, but you can call me Sera.” She held out a hand and he kissed it.

“You shouldn’t be out here at night you know plenty of lions and tigers..” He warned her.

“Well, won’t you protect me?” She asked her cheeks turning pink.
“Nah, I don’t wanna die.”
She shook her head and laughed loudly.
“Shhh, the tigers will get you and carry you off.” He teased.
“I know you will save me..what’s your name my hero?”
“Yazid.” He said
“That’s pretty.” She ran her hand through her short hair.
“Why is your hair so short?” He asked.
“I hate long hair its a bother.” She walked closer. He was so tall she felt small at 5’9 and that made her feel good because she always felt bigger than everyone else.
“Go back inside.” He told her.
“Why?” She batted her eyelashes at him.
“Don’t ask me why go inside.” He held up his hand and suddenly pushed her inside and followed her.
“There’s tigers out there woman!” He snarled
She somehow wanted to cry because his words were harsh.She also felt protected because he pulled her to the window and out that window into the dark a patch of orange and black passed by.
“Oh my God!” She gasped.
“I could feel it.” He said and I wasn’t about to be it’s dinner and you its desert.”
She put her arms around his neck and he was shocked by the warmth in his culture women didn’t grab men and hug them like this.
“Oh God, you saved me..” She panted.
He held her a moment then let her go “It was nice meeting you. I will be here for a few days if you want to talk.” And he left her after locking the door of the small inn that belonged To sheik Alum. Shiek Alum was a friend of her uncle’s and that is how she had came to south africa. She had met him and for a week followed him like a pup around the small elegant Inn. They talked, they went for long walks and she lost her heart.

After South Africa she followed him to his homeland of Algeria, she worked as a nurse’s aid at a hospital and she lived alone in a hospital apartment. They had made love with a passion she had not known , she had been married before to Alexander for 10 years and never had she felt so intense, so in love.

They spoke of marriage, but she knew his parents feelings they knew of her but she was not allowed to come to their house. Now, that they didn’t know where she was because he had hidden her. She was crying often because he was seeming to drift when he had been by her side hours of loving, playing, laughing, arguing, getting back together.. Now, she didn’t know.

Somewhere out side he was here in his birthplace. She touched the air with her hands..”Where is my Yazid?” She asked the wind that touched her warmly.

At night she locked her bedroom door and pushed heavy furniture against the door. She was afraid one of her “Protectors” Would get lonely and bother her.

How many days could someone be lonley like this ? How many hours had to pass..she would cry for him. One day she decided to pack her things and she went to the door.

“I want out. I want to go back to America.” She said with a defiant tear.

“Sir won’t like it.” A skinny teenager with a smile said.
“I don’t care. I am leaving today, drive me to the train station.” She demanded. These men knew how strong minded this woman could be they had witnessed the arguements between their boss and his lady love and it could be loud.

“We can not let you go, we have to protect you, when Sir comes back you can go.” The boy assured her.

She was angry. She wanted to shove him, but she sat down in one of the plush chairs in the parlor to think for a while.

She could not stay here. She could not keep eating and drinking and sleeping loneliness.

Three days later Yazid arrived with much fanfare. The people who worked at the house whopped and hollered and he laughed and spoke in Arabic and they carried his suitcases upstairs. She would not run down to him she sat on the large four poster bed unmoving. He entered the room and seeing here there remained still. He always fought his emotions around her. He told her he would.He said he loved her but he was stubborn. He didn’t swoop her up in his arms.
“Come.” He ordered softly.
“How long has it been Yazid 2 months or 3 tell me ?” She asked.
He went to her and held a box. “I brought you something so open it please before I throw it out the window…”
She knew he would do that. She stood up. Her eyes locked on his
“I won’t kiss you.” He said.
“I don’t care.” She bit her bottom lip and took the box. She opened it it was wrapped in red shiny paper with a black ribbon it was small and she opened it ..Inside the box was a ring a silver ring with a black stone, an onyx the shape of a heart with some filagree work on the side.
“It’s beautiful.” She said. She was afraid to move though because he was unpredictible. He could walk out or he could hold her. She knew he hadn’t liked it that when he walked in she had been cold.
She blinked back tears.
“You missed me I know it.” He grabbed her up in his arms and kissed her. She sank into his skin like a leach burying into the blood of a wounded animal. They made love for hours and she fell asleep in his arms.

For a few days they were happy again. Having breakfast on the beautiful veranda, laughing , kissing and then he said he was going to leave again.

“I can’t do it anymore, I have to go home.”She said bitterly as he was packing his suitcase.

“You won’t ?” He said one thick dark eyebrow raised.

“Why are you leaving me again!” She shook her fist at him..”Are your parents trying to marry you off…what is it?” She spat.

“No one can marry me off, I will be with who I chose.” He reminded her.

“Well, I don’t know if you are ever going to chose me, and as much as I wish you would I can’t keep being this house guest.” She shook her head.

“Just a week I promise.I won’t stay away long and when we come back I will take you to a lovely place and you will like it.” He kissed her forhead.

“Zee (she called him Zee for short) I need to go home for a while to my family. I need to see my mother.” She said her blue eyes telling him it was the truth.

* I am real

Kelly ann closed her lap top and looked out the window. People often talked about the outside world, versus the cyber world. But the cyber world was where she and Jake had lived, loved, fought, made up. She was lost without Jake. He was her everyday for a year and a half. He seemed to be withdrawn and told her he was busy when he used to say “lets talk”. She had sent him too many messages and the common friends they shared had went to Jake saying she was in bad shape…she had been. She loved him.She hated herself for sending him a multitude of messages from “You are cheating on me.” to “You don’t love me” or “Just tell me the truth!!!!” She sobbed in those messages because now she was afraid he was going to hate her. He knows me she would say he knows how I am when I feel insecure, I hope he won’t think I’m a wacko…She was a woman in love with a man far away they had so much against them. Different countries, different everythings. He was her best friend along with Arianne. They had so many fun times on the computer and on the phone distance had been nothing. But now he was so far that she couldn’t hold him and let him gaze into her blue eyes that had poured out tears. To him, maybe he was busy, maybe he thought it no big deal to go days without talking but Kelly was wounded. Her own husband and she didn’t talk much. She had felt that she was in a marriage because she had married too young, and because of the kids she was stuck. But with Jake she could talk and laugh and there was an attraction there. He had played with some girls online and she cringed thinking he had told them he loved them. She wondered how his love for her differed for that he professed for them. She somehow felt she had won out those times, but still she hated that he had told them he cared. She didn’t want Jake to be a player, in a way he wasn’t. But she didn’t want love as a word she wanted it as much as dying man wanted to see his fondest lover one more time it was urgent. Now, She was alone at home so far from Jake. She had an active mind, and thirsted for things to keep her mind occupied. She knew some how she had to meet Jake in real life, past the wires, and touch him. What if he didn’t want her anymore? She had went online last night and one of the bad guys was on trying to get her to send pics. She was disgusted. There was no intellect behind these people, there were no care they only wanted to get off and she was filled with a venom for them. She was so much more than a photo she had depth and a fire of a personality. Jake had seen it. He had accepted it. He told her the other day in one of their 2 minute skype convos that she had better change somethings and that had been 2 spears to the chest. Why was he wanting her to change ? When he had loved her as she was taken a broken shell and glued it back together. What was going on with them? At night she tried to not think of him, but she did. He had made her happy to feel loved and wanted. She could have another man, she knew it but Jake was all she had ever wanted in a guy and this was important to her. She cursed herself for loving him yet it had happened naturally. They had talked hours and hours, and now he said he had no time for talk. She had a dream that her tonsils had to be removed and she felt that was in a way telling her she had to be silenced. “I need more time.” She had told the doctor on the other end of the phone. Strange dreams that also had been about being in a crowded party at an elderly ladies house people were celebrating and she was on a sofa with people she didn’t know. She had looked out the window and there was a beautiful view of the woods and lush green and she had said to the man on the sofa next to her, “He must have loved her a lot to buy her this place.” Outside she had walked and there were brown flowers which fell from the heavy tree limbs and she worried if they were dead but something told her they were alive and this was their color. She had woke up and called Arianne. “It’s another day.” She said and rolled around on her bed. She closed her eyes and tried to imagine some romance, but no face would come to her mind. Just Jake and his glasses and his scowl. She didn’t want to type to him or do anything but she picked up her phone and texted…”I just want to say I love you.”

m

I am passionate and dramatic I always want someone to want me. I feel lonely right now…Carly is walking around in a towel she has just written this in her journal. The hot summer day has almost killed her. How can Jarik keep dissing her. She is mad for her guy pal Jarik but all he wants to do is watch movies and build websites. She always says she will stop talking to him but she clicks with him when he is not clicking his remote control.She  calls him on the phone he is on line at the store. I can’t talk C.” He hangs up she fights back tears. She gets online and tries to flirt with boring strangers with fake ids and runs her hands through her short red hair. She paces and goes to the shower. The pina colada shower gels makes her feel better she rubs in on her arms, her breasts and  tummy she is turned on but for what? She makes the water cold which runs her out faster. She walks naked through her small apartment. Why does she care about Jarik? There are other guys out there, why does he do it for her ? She get the milk out of the fridge and drinks it cold her lips now looking like a new borns. She wipes them with the back of her hand.
Jarik calls and says he will come over, he makes it sound as if he will have 3 teeth pulled. She throws some salmon on the george foreman grill and cuts up some salad. Wearing a short black dress she is sure he will say she looks fat even though she has lost 78 pounds thank you ! Her blue eyes dart across the small apartment for candles she lights all 10, some smell of vanilla, of pies, of wax. She dims the lights. She has been with Jarik before and it was wonderful they wanted one another so much, but he always wanted to be friends because she is seperated from her husband whom she had married at 21. She is 38 and Jarik is 23. Mentally they are both sharp, and always thinking, their bodies fit perfect age is a number and if he doesn’t want to screw her at 70 so what right now she is still young and sexy.

He walks in because he has a key. He is tall and smiling. “Too many candles.” He sits down a brown paper bag on the counter moving her various fashion mags. He presents her with a bag of shrimp. “Okay.” She says taking them and smiling because they are deveined and won’t take long to make. “I am making salmon too.” She says and she puckers her lips. “Why do you make me kiss you?” he teases, “Well, why should I ask you should just do it.” She insists. The truth is he wants to kiss her, but he is fighting it. Coming to Carly’s is like a man going into a dangerous lion den. He wants her and she wants him, its just very complicated. He kisses her cheek and she puts her hand against his chest and stares up at him with those blue gray eyes. “Go on, make your dinner.” He says . “Its for you too!” She pulls him to the sofa. He doesn’t know how she is adjusting. She had a big fancy house and now a small apartment. Her husband had given her that and they shared their 3 kids. This weekend was free for her. She missed them but also she needed this all her adult life had been so hard and busy and full of arguments with a man she both loved and longed to flee from…

“I might leave C, I got things to do.” He says as she is grilling the salmon,  he looks at her, she is tall and beautiful and he loves her. “Well if you go its your loss.” She tells him throwing some shrimp in a pan with olive oil and some basil. “Don’t mess up the shrimp I smell something gross.” He stands up and comes to look…

“Just relax Jarik, let me cook please.” He wants to tease her, but he runs his hands through his black hair and pushes his glasses back up on his nose. He is so Clark Kent and Superman. She turns off the gas and goes and sits on the sofa. She has a glass of wine. “I don’t like wine, but I want to have it…come on sit down.” She smiles. “You are bossy, you always say everyone else is but you are so bossy like a kid.” He tells her and takes a glass of wine. “Yeah I know, it’s wrong.?” She sits close to him and puts her hand on his leg. “I love you .” She tells him.

“I know you do and I love you too.” He says smelling her hair. “Sometimes, I ignore you I know but you know its just me.” She nods. “I told you lonely should be tattooed on my ass.” She laughs and giggles, her face going red. Jarik shakes his head. She often worships him she is so hungry for love and because he loved her she sinks her whole being into trying to keep him and he knows this..He often watches her sleep and kisses her forehead her nights often restless.

“Can you stay all night?” She asks him taking his large hand in hers.

“No.” He says flatly his brown eyes molten.

“Why not, It’s not that bad Jarik, I need some company.” She smiles at him.

“Get that fake dick of yours out of the closet and …”

“Stop!” She is hurt and gets up and he knows he has crossed the line again. She goes to the kitchen gets the food and puts it on the coffee table.

“I won’t cry over this one, I get sick of crying over what you say.” Carly shakes her head.

“Fake dicks don’t talk.” He says.

“Just be quiet” She closes her ears with her hands and he laughs

She sits back down again and watches him eat. She is amused and tries to wipe his face.

“Hey I know you are older and all but I can wipe my mouth.” He teases. She smiles because this is an old joke. Her mind is racing because

she is thinking what can she do to get him in bed. He always has some kind of mental block its like he fights his feelings as if she is some kind of poison.

To be continued

Lady

you remind me of the love I once had

your heart pure and sometimes sad

Lady you have broken many a heart

and mended hearts as well

your beauty is beloved

you are a red feather floating

like a cloud

rest your cheek against his

love

your breasts against his chest

lovely lady

beauty uncomparable to the rest…

Makaya was a spirit she had passed on more than a century ago. She was floating, walking lightly in legs she could not longer feel touch the ground.

She liked to be near water because as a child she had spent time in the summers near the ponds and creeks and rivers with her father. She had no concept of time, it didn’t exsist anymore.But she did somehow she did. The weather didn’t bother her, she could withstand rain, wind, heat she felt nothing but light somehow the light that had called her into the world and walked her out was always with her and it was never dark.In life she was a beautiful Native american woman with long black braids and beautiful delicate features. Time had no meaning, but did she ? She didn’t think much, it was just a fact she had died of a sickness. Many of her family died and if time mattered it was a minute ago it was hundreds of years ago.She looked toward the light and blinked back what on a earth person would have been tears. She missed her mother. So many tales of when you pass away you do not miss loved ones and want for nothing are not all true.There is a real peace of course and no pain, but she still yearned for her mother. She wondered if she would ever meet The Great Spirit but many wandered the world as spirits and guides. She often would be beside children in need or those who were to leave this world holding their small hands.They would touch her long hair and if they made it back to the day light after a fevered night some spoke of a dark haired angel who had helped them and told them “Don’t be afraid.” Sometimes, she felt as if this lack of time would make her fade into nothing,but she was there near the creek when she saw him a young man in mortal years perhaps 27 years of age. He was handsome and the light from the afternoon sun was on his brown hair highlighting it. She watched him because she could and he would never be any the wiser…The soft wind blew through the man’s beautiful hair and she watched him like a wise owl.Sometimes, if people were in danger she used all the spirit energy she could  to try to get the person to “feel” something was wrong. Often, they would be saved from danger and many had died before her eyes. She felt no danger for this man, she could only watch him. He was drinking water now, he had a canteen and repeated dipping it into the cool water. Now, she was behind him. It seemed like he could not get enough water. She shook her head. He turned around and sat on a rock drinking the water and wiping his beautiful mouth with the back of his rugged hand. She came closer and suddenly…” Who are you?” He asked. She was shocked and she stopped. She looked around but there was no one there. “You, who are you?” She was puzzled and stood like a deer frozen. She stared. He stood up and walked over to her and held out his hand. “Are you alright?” She nodded. Could it be possible that he could see her? No one had seen her in so long, she didn’t exsist, yet she did. Tears ran down her face and she could feel them. “Oh.” She stammered. She knew English, she knew Languages that no one should know had they not died and been a spirit who consumed and knew much and all and yet nothing. She  touched her hair, she could feel it long and smooth and warm from the sun. “She was dumbfounded.” He offered her his canteen, fearing she was suffering from heat exhaustion. She drank it choking and sputtering it had been 100 years since water had  touched her lips. She began to sob and he held her in his arms. “What is wrong? Can I help you?” She pulled away and looked up at his blue eyes. Was he God? ” I am …” she forgot her name for a moment. “Makaya.” She said softly. He smiled. “That is a beautiful name. Why are you here all alone?” He asked her and she sat down on the rock and she could feel it cold and hard underneath her, she ran her hands on it as if it was the most lovely thing in the whole universe. ” I need to talk to someone.” She started. “Yes, go on.” He sat down next to her on the large rock. “I am afraid if I tell you , you will think I am a loon, but I promise you all my words are truth stranger.” He smiled, ” My name is Ethan. Tell me.” He was worried now she was in some kind of trouble and discomfort. Her dark molten brown eyes, filling with tears. “I am a ghost, I died a hundred years ago.” She said. She was shaking. His eyes widened. “My people, were very sick with yellow fever, I watched my family die you see. I lay in fever for days and finally I saw the light and I went to it, since then I have been walking the earth.” She held out her hand. He took a deep breath. “Well now.” Ethan was no fool. He believed that she was telling the truth about her family, perhaps the fever had messed with her brain and caused some damage, some distortion. “Today, somehow I saw you and you saw me.” She stood up then. ” I don’t want to go back to the light I want to live!” She said crying and he wrapped her in his arms. She shook and shook until she sank to the ground in a deep sleep he watched her and constantly checked for the beating of her heart in her neck and wrist she was very much alive.When she awoke she looked around her and saw his face. He was smiling. “You didn’t leave me ?” She asked. “No, why should I leave a lady unattended?” His eyes were blue like the pond and very concerned. She was shaking. “I think you have been through something very hard and you need to just rest and try to gather some needed sleep.How could she explain she hadn’t slept in a century? “No.” She looked to the east had her family’s village been that way? Would any of the people still be there? “Tell me about the Indians around here.” She started. “Indians..” He looked at her of course she was Indian doe skin dress, braids, beautiful copper skin. “Well, Most of them are on reservations now.” She clutched her chest. “Oh God no..” She wanted to find her people but they would all be gone, only what would of been great nieces and Nephews born from her brother’s seed. she had no one. He went to her and offered her water but she waved him away. This was a hell if there was no hell except there was an angel of  a man right in front of her. He kept talking and offering water, food. She was so confused. Her name was Makaya she was 22 when she died, she had not wanted to die she had many dreams, she wanted to marry, to have babies. She did not want to die !!! She collapsed at his feet and when she did so he knealt beside her calling her name over and over to no avail.

“My name is Peter.” He told her when after many hours she awoke. She grabbed him by the shirt collar. Had she went back to death? She touched his face. She took deep gasps of air. She waved her hands in front o f her touching the damp night air. She began to cry again. He smoothed her long hair with his hands. And talked softly to her. “Tel me what happened to you..I promise I will listen.” “I tried to tell you before, it’s all crazy talk you will think I am out of my mind.” He shook his head. ” I want to hear more I will not speak you talk.” He wanted to know her story and maybe get this beautiful young woman some help. She closed her eyes and began her story.

” I had just turned 21 summers when many people in my village became ill. We all thought it would soon pass,but so many of us lay dying.” She shook her head. “You won’t believe me.” She put her head in her hands.

“Go on tell me.” He sat cross legged now in front of her on the rock.

“I lay there with a fever and I was too weak to cry.I didn’t want to die, I didn’t want to leave my family,  but there was such a bright light and one day it just seemed to blanket me and then it seemed all I did was walk, and I knew I was a ghost.” Her black eyes warned him that what she spoke was the truth and that he should believe her.

“Alright, and now you are alive again?” He asked her reaching out his hand to her.

“I don’t know. I can feel my heart beat again, I can feel the air on my face I can taste water in my mouth it as if all time has came back to me, but all my people, my mother, my father, my sister are long dead.” She sobbed.

He really didn’t know what to think. It made no sense how could this young woman believe she was a living ghost ? But she was hurting. Something told him she wasn’t a liar, maybe she had had a fever and became delerious. He knew she shouldn’t be out in the wilderness alone and maybe he should try to take her to a reservation, but that was no life for anyone. He stood up and held out his arms in which she walked into his embrace.

“I will try to help you find your family.” He promised.

“No, you must believe me they are gone. So much time is gone. I am not crazy.” She begged.

“I’m not saying you are crazy, let’s go investigate some things and see what we can find out about your people.” He reasoned.

“NO. I fear this is all a dream and I will not be breathing in a few hours or minutes.” She walked around lost and he felt such pity on her his heart ached.

“WIll you come with me then? I can not leave you out here alone.” He was getting his horse ready now, but she was shaking again.

“I am a lost soul just leave me.” She pleaded.

“No, you are very much alive now, you come with me. He took her by the hand. She didn’t argue because she had no life, no ties, no hopes no dreams and she wondered if she really exsisted.

They rode for hours and when they stopped she refused to sleep.

“You have to sleep.” He urged her and he had laid blankets out for her .

“No if I go to sleep I will die.” She was certain, “And, I have not slept for many years.” She reminded him.

He was baffled by her. He looked at her clothes, they were new soft doe skin, highly decorated, she was dressed as a woman of importance. Her hair was long and black and clean. She was young and beautiful. How could she say she had died ? How could she be here with him now and what was he to do ?

To be continued

TBC

Love can awaken much ..

More than they know

Claire watches Mark get on the bus, She wants him. She thinks about going to his apartment and kissing him when he opens the door, this is all fantasy. She decides one day that she will tell him she likes him, but she chickens out and goes back to the bus stand and sits on the bench first making sure there is no pigeon poop..She met Mark three years ago at a party and has had a secret crush on him for that long. He is tall with dark brown hair and green eyes. He is gorgeous, smart and funny. They hang out sometimes.. Now she is standing and he walks over to her at the bus stand. “Hey Claire.” She nods and smiles, but inside she wants to tell him she wants to make love to him, kiss him at least. “Why you here?” He asks. “Oh, me, well I just want to go somewhere.” She says. “Well, I am headed to the movies, do you wanna go?”She blows a bubble and looks bored. If she acts too interested what will happen? She says “Okay.” and they hop on the bus and sit together.” I might get shipped out you know.” He says looking at her, her blue eyes so much like a lovely lake or some enchanted body of water. “Oh..I don’t want anyone else to get shipped out.” She shivers. So many men have died already. “This war is stupid, I can’t think about it.” She rolls the blue eyes. “Well, we have to do whats best for the country Claire.” She shakes her head. ” I don’t belong to any country, I may live here now, but I don’t belong anywhere really and no one owns me Mark.” She stands up because the movie theatre stop is coming she knows the place well, she is into drama, romance mostly. He stands up tall and thin, and they walk out. “OH I want to see Casablanca!” She tugs at his arm. He follows her. “Alright then, Casblanca.Do you want popcorn?” He is already in line and she is blushing. He thinks she is so beautiful, but she sends him so many mixed signals. The movie starts and she is smiling at him. He asks her “Do you want me to hold your hand?” Her face turns so red that he worries that she will pass out. “If you want to sure…” Its as if someone asks do you want more pie. Then there is the shocking feel of his hand in hers and she smiles. She can not believe it. The movie is so good that when its over all she can talk about is Lauren Bcall. “Oh she is lovely, isn’t she mark?” “Yeah she’s nice, but you are pretty too.” She shakes her head. “Well, I appreciate you saying that!”

After that day they go out often and before she knows it one night they are kissing  and she can’t believe this is the Mark she has worshipped for so long. He tells her about his life and she admits always watching him. He tells her he knew she was watching sometimes, but didn’t he bore her to tears? Then one day real tears come and he leaves her to go To Germany. She is devastated because life at home is hard, her mom has crying spells and is withdrawn so much from her and her brother. Mark had taken up most of her time the last 3 years and she was getting to know him now. They had spent his last day at home at the movies and having a burger and talking. He had said he was in love with her and she had broken down crying. Everything was so romantic and sometimes when he kissed her he ran his hand up her blouse, but she didn’t protest but melted into the desire and wanted more. Now, he was gone and so many of the men were gone. It seemed odd to look around town and so many husbands and fathers and boyfriends just not there.She tries not to go crazy. She spends time with her girlfriends making them laugh some of her girlfriends are pregnant some are becoming widows, some becoming engaged. She is 24 all of this is too much for her seeing a 23, 22, 25 year old widow. She writes Mark everyday long boring love letters.She tells him about the weather, about how her brother is driving her mad and about Mom finally seeming some better. She tells him about the shoes she can’t wear because she has big feet and about how he better not get killed. She asks him if he is scared in the war and tells him to fight to stay alive for her.

One day she is alone in the movies, she is trying not to cry but it happens he has been gone for 7 months now. She has written so many letters and replayed the kisses they shared in her mind.SHE is wiping her eyes with her pink hankie when someone touches her shoulder, she turns around fearfully because it is dark and not a lot of people come this time of day. It is dark but the light from the screen is showing her a familiar face. “MARK !” She squeals..”SHHHH….” Someone says.

“I’m home baby.” He kisses her cheek. He sits down next to her and holds her hand. “Oh my God, Mark how did you get here…” She is wiping her eyes and kissing him. His lips are like candy and she yearns for more kisses. She stands up again and grips his hands. “Tell me again you are really here !”  ”SHHHHH!” Says the voice from somewhere in the large room. “I may have to  leave again.” He pulls her out of the aisle and they go outside where the afternoon sunlight hurts her eyes.

She hugs him again and again. “I missed you so much Mark..” tears are rolling down her eyes. “Every time someone has to bury someone, I worry its going to be you coming home in a box. I can’t take it anymore.”She sobs into his uniform. “No, No, don’t you cry this way, I didn’t come so far to see you crying now stop it.” He kisses her forehead.

They walk for a long time through town and there are some more uniformed young men walking their faces tired. She keeps looking at him as if he will just fade into mist like in a movie. Will he ask her to marry him? What will he do ? She cant take it anymore so she throws her arms around him. “Are you going to ask me to marry you Mark?” She is turning red and worried now.

“I know I love you a lot, but I don’t want to ask you that right now because a lot of fellas are marrying girls, just to hold on to them, I don’t wanna do that, I wanna get out of this hell first and then ask because I want us both to be sure.” He sees her face sink into sadness. He lifts her chin with his hand. “Listen to me okay, I am telling you I love you, let’s be patient, I want you so much.” He  pushes her up against the wall of an old office building, not caring who can see them  he kisses her deeply until she feels as if she will faint.

“I promise you I want you in my life.” He smiles, I came back here didn’t I? All I want is to survive this war and come home for good, then I will ask you to marry me if you still want me is this a deal?” He asks her. Claire nods and kisses his hand. “I just want you to come home and stay home Mark, that’s all I want. He grins at her and they walk back towards Town to have a burger and to wait for the bus home.

Sarah met alum online. He was the first to tell her hello on a dating site. Since she had been married before and never really knew anyone but the ex she seemed to had bonded with Alum. He was handsome, charismatic and he was always posting pics just like she was. They were beautiful.If they could have met in real life what a spark perhaps. They shared thier love online, she dancing in front of the webcam he kissing the screen pretending that she was there. It was the sterility of it all that made her give up on Allum often. she knew he was a playboy, girls would fly over to his country to spend a few days in Cotton sheets with this handsome guy who told her he loved her. They would not speak for months then end up together (apart). She lay in front of the lap top wearing a silken gown looking like a princess. “I won’t ever have you will I Allum? She bit her bottom lip. “You are far away, you won’t come here.” She smiled …”I wont to in a way, in a way I dont. I feel like you are out of reach no matter plane ticket or not. “Tell me Allum do you really love me?” Her green eyes pleading into the laptop’s webcam. He smiled a golden smile, and laughed. “Well, I love 2 or 3 girls right now. She blinked back tears.”Don’t do that Sarah, you always have guys chasing you.” She nodded. “Yeah, but part of me always wants to be your number one.” She ran her hands through her dark brown hair. She had done things with him online she wished could come to life with touch and hands and kisses. He had announced he was agreeing to an arranged marriage and she had wailed out in pain and cried for 2 hours. “Don’t get married Allum.” She pleaded. “Will you come to me then?” He loved her, how he was not sure and he told her that, he loved women, he loved making love in real, on cam anywhere and he had daydreamt of making this one his queen, but something always happened. “Lets not make any promises, let’s just be….” His voice ended as she shut down the laptop she lay her head on top of it he was just a play boy and she had loved him and in some way he had loved her she was sure of it.

**** Sometimes the grass is greener on the other side
but how lovely it is***************************************

Makaya Hawkins was beautiful at 36, she was still one of the most stunning women in the room. Tall, with beautiful blue eyes, lips men longed to kiss…a soft body although heavier set she never went without compliments. She wore a dark navy floor length gown that was tight at the waist and the corsets added to her ample bossom pushing up the lovely pearls of flesh.

She wanted badly to dance. Jacob her husband was talking about work, always the same. Last nigh she had tossed and turned and cried because she just didn’t feel the same passion she had. She looked at the young couples whispering and the young ladies blushing. She felt just as young. She felt more alive than she ever had, yet she was over to the side making chit chat.

When she saw Raif, her face flushed and her eyes widened. He was a sight to look at. He was tall six ‘ Two with lovely dark brown almost black hair soft green eyes, a toned body and a sexy smile.She wished with all her heart he would ask her to dance. She moved closer, there was no harm in saying hello. She was known for her friendly nature and kind spirit.

“Hello Raif.” Makaya blushed?“Ah Makaya, how are you?” He asked her raising her gloved hand to his lips.
“Oh I am terribly bored.” She said and she batted her eyelashes at him.
She was striking with her auburn hair and sweet baby face and eyes a man would kill for.
“Would you like to dance?” He asked her.
“Of course I would.” She took his hand and he led her out to the dance floor. Heads turned as the lovely Mrs. Hawkins and the younger Raif Bentley took over the dance floor, both tall, beautiful creatures. They were both graceful and beautiful, they made a good match as any two people could. He with the high cheekbones, she with haunting eyes.

“You are such a good dancer Makaya, that husband of yours should be proud.” Raif said and he kissed her hand.
Makaya did not want to go back to the crowd and stand against the wall. She did not want to make hints for her husband to leave. She wanted more dancing with Raif, to feel alive.

She decided to go outside, the night was warm. She was on the verge of crying when Raif taped her on the shoulder. “I really had a nice time dancing with you.” He said. His green eyes lovely like a cat’s.

“Thank you Raif. I appreciate your kind words.” She said and she turned away.
Raif looked at Makaya she was one of the prettiest women in town. She was not only pretty but she was kind hearted, always working with the poor from which she orginally came, always giving. He wondered how Mr. Hawkins could ignore his lovely angel who looked terribly lonely at this moment. She stood under an old oak the moonlite falling on her dark almost red, almost black tresses. she turned to him.

Her eyes seem to be searching his soul. He could feel an unfamiliar want inside himself the way s he smiled at him.

“I’m fine.” She told him. And she wrapped her dark blue shawl tight around her shoulders.
“No, I don’t think so.” Raif said and he came closer.
“What?” She asked.
“I wish I could kiss you, so much.” He said. Thinking aloud.
She was quite shocked, but she smiled. Her beautiful full lips making an angelic, yet sultry smile. ? “I wish you would Raif.” She said. And she came closer, “Please.” She whispered.

He didn’t speak he just did he took her face into his large hands and kissed her softly at first then deeper. His passion stirred and she returned the kiss with her own yearning.

After some time they pulled apart.

“Don’t apoligize.” She said softly.
“I wasn’t going to.” Raif said and he grinned at her.
“Thank you for that Raif.” She told him.
“You don’t need to thank me, Makaya, I wanted to do that for a long time.” He promised.
“Really.” She said blushing.
“Of course.” He kissed her hand. “Let me walk you back inside.” He offered and she took his offer and looped her arm inside his arm.

Jacob was still angry. “Why make a scene?” He asked her.
“He walked me inside J what is the problem?” She was so tired of this now. He had went on and on about Raif walking her inside, Raif dancing with her. If only he knew they had kissed.
“You aren’t a teenager Kay.” He reminded her.
“I am at heart.” She said and she walked away. She knew when to leave her husband when he was preaching. he was only 40, but he acted 70. He had acted 70 for the past five years and she had had enough. Secretly, she had thought about an affair often over the past five years. She had flirted, hinted..No one took her seriously. One of the men in town wrote her a letter of admiration, but nothing had happened and the letter had faded.

Did she have any chance with Raif? He was ten years her junior. He was an earl’s son and in all rights an earl himself though he wasn’t rightly called so. His family had always been in the limelite at parties and she had watched him become a teenager to a handsome young man. She never thought she could have a chance with him. Her daydreams were strong and in them he had made love to her many times, in reality, would he dare be interested in a married woman 10 years his senior? What was age? She didn’t look old, she didn’t feel old. She wanted him. She had had enough of being a good wife and mother, she wanted to lay on her back and take a man inside her that truly wanted her with all his being. She wanted a man to kiss her and hold her and think of her when they couldn’t be together and want her so much it hurt.

Foolish dreams that was all it was. She knew her lot in life was to be a wife and Mother, to sit quietly and let life pass her by. She had made a mistake in not persuing adventure when she was a young girl. She had always been afraid back then. Now, that she was not so afraid so many chances were gone. She stood in front of the mirror insepcting her self. She tried hard not to cry. She would often break down when she thought of her mother who had died when she was seventeen.She also thought of Candace her thirteen year old daughter, who had little respect for her. She shook her head.Was she a fool to think she could pursue Raif?

Raif watched Lady Hawkins step out of the carriage. She had suddenly became very interested in his mother and grandmother. She was bringing cake today. “Hello Raif.” She smiled.

“Lady Hawkins.” He smiled recalling he had called her Makaya the other evening.
“Please, don’t call me that.” She said and she handed the basket of sweets to him.
“I just adore your grandma and your Mother..” She was walking into the house hurriedly.
“Well, today they aren’t home I’m afraid.” He said taking the basket. “But I shall leave this for them with a note that you had came to visit.”
“Oh.I should of told them, but I wished to suprise them with the cake.” She looked like a disappointed little girl and he fought the urge to hug her.
“Well, I was just going to go out for a ride.” He wondered if he should ask her to join him. Her blue eyes widened.
“Then I won’t keep you.” She started to turn towards the door.
“You are welcomed to join me, I am taking the carriage out.” He smiled. “I was going to just go for a ride, but it is a lovely day.” He stared at her, she was indeed a gorgeous creature, with alabastor skin and a cherab blush.
“Alright. I would like that.” She said.
“Daniels get the carriage ready please.” He instructed his stable boy.
“Should we take some snacks with us?” She was slightly hungry as it was getting close to lunch.
“I will tell Becky in the kitchen to prepare something.” He left her then and she could hear him ask for some finger sandwiches and a flask of water.

In the carriage she sat next to him.”yes, it is beautiful out today.” She said and she was happy to be outdoors in the bright light and warm wind.
“I know. I need more days like this work has been hectic for me, to run the family business.” He turned to her, his green eyes a lovely peridot with flecks of brown.
“you have such pretty eyes.”She told him.

“As do you.” He smiled. He knew of a seculded place with a small creek. They could enjoy thier lunch and have privacy. He didn’t want tongues wagging about them. She was a lady who’s husband was well respected as was his family. If people knew that they were alone together there would surely be gossip as there was about everything else.

He helped her down from the carriage. “Oh this is a pretty place.” She could hear the water from the brook. “Oh its really nice.” She said again kicking off her shoes.
“Yes, I come here sometimes to think.” He spread the picnic blanket and she began to rumage through the basket of treats.
“Thank you for letting me come along with you. I get so bored sometimes.” She told him. “Now that the children are all in school, I just feel lost.” She was an honest person and had been paining her greatly that she was alone at home with only the occosional social visit.

“But its a new life for you.You must enjoy the freedom.” He looked at her flushed face.
“Do you recall the other night or was it my dreams Raif?” She could feel an intense burn in her cheeks.
“yes of course.” He told her.
“I have thought about it many times. I can’t get it out of my mind.” She looked down now ashamed.
“Makaya.” He said softly.
“yes?” She asked hopefully.
“Was it what you wanted?” He came closer to her.
“yes, it was.”She prayed he would kiss her again.
Raif fought with himself on this one. If he kissed her again, what would happen? He was not a priest, he was a man full of desire for a beautiful woman. Did she think they could be good friends, and have picnics often? What did she want with him? What kind of unique friendship was she searching for?
“Makaya, you must know I do desire you.” He held her hands in his.
“But you are married. It would only hurt you in the long run if we pursued any kind of realationship.” He bit his lower lip.
“ Married.Do you want me?” She looked at him innocently as if she didn’t have any hope in the world for his reply to be yes. Her blue eyes darkening with worry.
“Why would I not want you?” He asked her. “You are a prize for any man, but surely you must know of the consequences.”
“I don’t care.” She said and she pulled him to her and kissed him with all the passion she had inside her for the years of longing and being left alone. It scorched his soul. The kiss was intense, Raif returned each kiss with more of his own and he could feel his manhood’s response to the lovely woman.

“He lay her down on the blanket the water flask tumbeling over and he kissed her neck. “How dare anyone ignore you my beauty.” He seemed to have read her mind, how could she be so full of lust and longing had not she been left alone like some prize doll on a shelf.
“I don’t know.” She said in a husky voice.
His kisses were feather lite in some places, painful and passionate in others. She did not want him to stop. His hands reached inside her dress and there he could feel the want of him.
“Ah..” She moaned. She searched his face, his eyes dark with passion. “Don’t stop, please don’t.” She begged.
He began to kiss her again…”Shh, my beauty calm down.” He said as she shook beneath him. His body was heavy against hers she could feel the muscles under his shirt, she slid her hand up under his shirt his skin like silk and muscle…. she was in heaven.
“Do you really want this Makaya?” He questioned. He could easily take her now fi only she said yes.
“Oh yes, I want you Raif, please.” She begged. he undid his pants and entered her at first she was in a daze, but as he began to move inside her the brillant fire was as beautiful and as bright inside her as anything could be…the pleasure was intense..he was big and hard and all man.

He moved in and out slowly savoring her then faster, harder. she moaned and he covered her mouth with deep kisses. She was so wonderful, he felt so alive moving inside this heavenly woman. Her eyes were closed, he kissed them. She was moaning and he quaked inside her…

Pouring water from the flask onto his hankerchief she cleaned herself best she could ..She was flushed and the lovemaking had been intense. He gathered everything and waited for on the carriage. He squeezed her hand they rode back in silence.

Makaya was in a dreamworld for the next few days. At night her husband was retreating to bed on his side of the bed, swaddled like a baby. That made her not regret being with her handsome younger man. The fact was she had been able to make love with Raif but would it ever happen again, or was that the last and only time. She had never had an affair so she did not know how it worked..She did know her body craved his. She would not go see him however and pretend that she had brough sweets. She could not chase the man. So now it was about the waiting.

She didn’t have to wait long because Raif showed up outside her home severeal days later, asking her if she would like to join him for another picnic. Her pulse had quickened. “Of course.:” She had said and hurried back into the house for her purse. It was another beautiful day and she hoped this pic nic would be the same as the last. ?“We have a nice little cottage up by the lake, I thought we would go there.” He told her.
“Oh that would be nice.” She said nervously.
Raif wanted Makaya, since he had been with her he could not think straight. Though he had never done without women since he was 15, she was exceptional from her lovely looks, to her voice, to her touch. He had never known such desire. They reached a small cottage which was near a small lake called Swan’s cry Lake. “I used to come here as a child, I found it boring, but today I shall it much more interesting I promise you.”

He opened the door with a key and lit some lanterns. It was a cozy little place with nice funiture and lace curtians, it was a big cottage with three bedrooms, a sitting room, and a kitchen. She went from room to room. “Oh its wonderful Raif, you must have enjoyed this.” She could imagine a little boy with dark hair and green eyes fishing at the lake then running to the cottage for his evening meal relutantly.

“Come here my beauty.” He pulled him to her. “Did you miss me?” He said
“I couldn’t think of anything else.” She told him his lips covering hers. “I can’t have enough of you, Makaya.” He told her as he pulled her down on the bed. “I can’t.” He wanted her so much that already the ache for her was intense. But, he would be slow, he would give her pleasure. He touched her in new places, tasted her, taunted her. When they were parted she was crying for his touch again tears streaming down never had she knew such happiness.
“Oh Raif, I do want you so much, so much.” She told him tears against his cheek.
“Don’t cry darling.” He whispered as he kissed her his love making intense again.They spent hours in the cottage, and when they parted ways she had to force herself into reality for the children’s sake.
Megan was angry. “Really, mother less socializing.” She said as she put her book down. “Poor papa was a mess worrying over you.” She scolded. Jacob glared at her and she smiled..”Well, you see, I am working on a new project, I am thinking about trying to help some children with theater we will do puppet shows, short dramas. I am very excited about it.”
Her youngest daughter Sylvia hopped on her mother’s beloved lap..”Oh Mama, I do want to sing so ..Can I?” Her dark brown eyes the color of her father’s the shape of her mother’s.
“Yes, of course you can!” Makaya was very hyper and happy and nervous. Her husband noticed. He wished to speak to her as soon as they retired for the night.
He didn’t talk, but went back to reading his book. Sometimes, she had such big ideas that never reached the sky only fizzled and fell, but with good intentions.

She helped the children with their lessons then saw them to bed. Megan was still angry and wouldn’t talk to her, but that was nothing new. The child was stubborn and aloof, she had gave her mother trouble since the day she was born and the two females seldom got along something that troubled Makaya a great deal. She was tired of accepting blame for all the wrong in her daughter’s life and decided to let her be, she would not beg her for love and affection.

She bathed and put on her night gown and crawled into bed. She never thought Jacob would touch her, but his hand was on her breast before her tired head hit the pillow. She hadn’t been with him in weeks. She searched her mind..Raif. She didn’t want Jacob to touch her and she flinched. Yet, he was her husband and if she refused him then he would suspect.She didn’t want this however and she turned to him we he captured her mouth in a tender kiss.

Guilt rushed through her like an infection. No, No, she had to hold it together. She would not let him know. All their married life she had told things to deaf ears, he had never taken much interest in what she had had to say or about her hopes and dreams..She willed herself to keep quiet and she held on to the blankets as he kisses drew more urgent. “ I am sorry my love, I have not meant to ignore you so long.” He said sweetly, she wanted to die, just as she had started relishing life now she wanted to die as her whole world was a crazy mess.

At breakfast Jacob was attentive and kissing his wife’s cheek and bringing her bread. He was a good man and now, Makaya was having doubts about the passion for raif. If she let him go now, maybe she would forget him soon. She would pretend it was all a dream and it never happened, she was used to fantasy so she would act as if nothing happened.Last night Jacob reminded her of what a tender man and caring husband he could be, but it did’t change the fact that for months at a time he could ignore her. She would talk to him make him promise not to ignore her, but she had done that before, and he had always went back to retreating to work and books. she could not understand why such a handsome, sweet man like her husband could deny her love and passion. He loved her, but..everything else..She was confused.

Raif was concerned about Makaya, he had not seen her in nearly a week. It was killing him as he began to pine for her in earnest. He felt that perhaps he was falling in love with her. He had been a fool at first to think that he would only use her for what he wanted and not care, but she was a sweet woman, the way she cared for him and talked to him. Not many people had shown Raif affection in his life. His mother saw him only as another heir she had five sons and he was just one of the lot, no daughters.

His Father cared, his father who was as proud as any man could be of five handsome sons, but it was like he was a trophy just as mother seemed to behave, the handsome couple with the gorgeous sons and the money. Makaya cared. She had sought him out, gave her body to him in trust that he would not hurt her, in many ways she was immature, fragile, easily read. It angered him that her husband had treated her like a pretty bird in a cage and he longed to sit her free.

IT was later on that day that he saw her in town. She was with her daughter, the small one and they were shopping. He went over to her and her face turned crimson.
“Hello.” He said his heart thundering.
“Hello.” Makaya answered.
Sylvie looked at Raif. “I know you your grandmother has the pretty dolls..” She recalled seeing the dolls in fine glass cabinets once at a party.
“Ah you remember that? Would you like a doll? I can ask Gran for one for you.” He tickeled her chin and Sylvia laughed.
“No, no its alright.” Makaya assured him. “Sylvie go with Becca and have a sweet mama will come inside soon.” She sent her daughter inside the sweet shop with becca thier nanny.

“I miss you terribly my beauty, why are you ignoring me.” His green eyes pressed her for an answer looking at her full rosebud lips he longed to kiss her. “Send the baby home and come with me to the cottage.” He implored.

“I can’t Raif. I want to, but I am trying to forget what happened.” She whispered.
“Why on earth?” He questioned. “We were so happy.”

She walked away from him but he followed taking her by the arm. “Come to me.” He said. “ I need you.” He wanted to kiss her so much that it pained him. Sylvia came running to her mother.

“Mama I want to go play with Sarah, May I go to her home?” Sylvie pleaded. Sarah lived about a mile away and often played with Sylvia. She looked at Becca. “Becca, there is some more work I need to do in town can you see her home. Mr. Raif here, will see I am home safely in the evening.”

Becca nodded her brown eyes complient. “Yes maam, I will take Sylvie.”?Makaya bent down and kissed her daughter’s tawny forhead “Have a good time baby.” Sylvie kissed her mother’s cheek and skipped alongside Becca.

“Come with me.” He said urging her to his carriage. She was trying to be angry and she was trying to think of a way to just think straight. At the cottage he was lifting her from the carriage opening the door and pushing her against the wall. “Tell me why you ignored me.” He said as he raised her dress to free her from it. His kisses were leathal and never lazy he wanted her and she wanted him.

?“Because I’m married Raif.” She couldn’t breathe.
“We can remedy that divorce him and marry me.” He said kissing her neck.
“You are not serious.” She murmured.
“I am , I have been thinking about it. I don’t want to be without you.” He said as he began to take her on a trip to heaven again with his mouth and hands. She was lost and she didn’t care, laying there on the cool bed they were the only two people in the world. She shot up then thinking of Sylvia..
“My little girl..” She gasped.
“Darling you sent her with the maid you forgot?” He kissed her forehead.
Makaya ran her hands through her tangled hair. “I need to go.” She stood up a little dizzy from rasing so suddenly.
“Alright of course.” Raif hated to see her off, but it was getting later. “I shall drop you.” He insisted. “You should say you were visiting my Gran.” He thought aloud.
“yes, whatever..” She was in a daze worried about Sylvie. It was a panic that had suddenly clutched her heart. “Hurry Raif, I am worried about Sylvie.” She pulled at his arms as he scrambeled into his boots.
“Alright darling.” He was still trying to reassure her when they reached her home. He saw her to the door. Jacob was at the door.
“I was at Lady Adelide’s.” She said
“Save it, your daughter is missing you terribly.” He said and glared at Raif.
“Don’t you think you should taxi ladies your own age in your carriage Raif?” Jacob shut the door on Raif’s face then and he went to find his wife. He was angry and quite sure something was going on between the younger earl and his mischievous wife.

Sylvie opened her arms wide to her mother. “Mama, I missed you terribly.” Sylvie sobbed into her mother’s dress.
“Its alright lovie, I am here now.” She said kissing Sylvie’s cherab face and wiping tears away.
“Mama, I was afriad when you left.” She sobbed.
“But I told you I would see you tonight baby.” She was anxious now if Sylvie had thrown a fit, then Jacob would scold her and start to pry. She whispered to Sylvie. “You know Mama would come home…Sylvie..Shhhh…”
“But you went with that man Mother.” She said loudly. ? “Sylvia Brianna Grace…” Makaya held her hand over her little mouth..
“You will be quite now and sleep this instance.” She blew out the candle and left the room, Her heart heavy with fear.
Jacob was in his study. “Come here.” He said softly.
“She’s fine.She was asked to play with a friend I went to visit Lady Adeleide.” She insisted.
“Alright.” He said. He stared at her his brown eyes light with amusement. “Tell me the truth now what you have been doing?”
“Visiting.” She said stepping backward.
“I don’t think so my minx I think you are trying to get into Raif’s bed if you haven’t already done so.” He took her by the arms.
“No.” She said staring at him angerily. “How dare you talk to me that way?” She snapped. Her face flushing.
“I am your husband, I buy your clothes, I feed you, I let you wear your pretty dresses, and buy your jewelry, you dare not cheat on me.” He warned.

Alone outside she looked up at the moon and recalled being a small girl pretending to be a princess. Life had changed. There were no simple pleasures not even in Raif’s arms. She was a fool then. He knew. He was a very intelligent man and he would not be played with. He was capable of taking her daughters and locking the doors on her. He loved her, but he would not be played with. She sat down on a bench and began to cry. It was a miserable night in which she felt nothing was to be looked forward to at all.

The next morning she had a new lease on life. She promised that she would neevr stray from her marriage again, she would be a better mother and doting wife. She would think of more of others and less of herself. She bathed and prayed and went about her life. She would not go near Raif and it time she would forget him. She may have said that before but she meant it now.

The first thing she did was to go to the orphanage and play with the children which she had not done in months. How she loved them. Not many people knew but Arianna had came from a home much like this one. Yes, it was true. She and Jacob had been married for four years when they stepped inside a home and claimed a beautiful honey skinned, brown eyed, black haired baby girl as their own. She longed for another baby, but she doubted Jacob would agree it had taken 12 years to get pregnant with Sylvie.

She held babies, played with toddlers and said goodbye after severeal hours. She went home and had tea even though she was not a tea person. She played with Sylvie and tried to speak to Arianna who was in a mood as usual. Yes, she could forget Raif for sure. It was at night when she couldn’t sleep meomories came to her of his gorgeous face colliding with hers. It had happened and it was real someone had wanted her besides her dear husband. Someone had made love to her for hours and needed her. She shook her head on the pillow and tried hard to fight the images that came and went in her head of their love making. It would not be easy to forget him because she truly cared for the man. There was more than just the passion. He cared for her and she cared for him. He was funny and charming, caring, he would make someone a wonderful husband one day. Those words stung her terribly and she fought back tears. She could not keep him. He was not a puppy for heaven’s sake but a handsome young man with a future that did not include her in it. She would come clean perhaps with her husband, but he already know and his heart must be broken because now he had started looking at her with sad eyes.

Raif pushed his carriage faster. His anger building inside him. Makaya was through with him? she had ignored him for weeks now. He did not want to part with his beautiful lover whose warm body was like a saving milk for him. He had been sure she would send word, something.He was going to find her. His grandmother had found out she was staying at her dear friend Kat’s home. Perhaps, she had needed time away, to think, maybe about him. He had been en route for four hours now, he would stop at an inn and go forward in the morning he wanted her in his arms so badly he could smell her skin.

The next morning when the door was being pounded on Kat muttered..”Who the bloody hell?” She looked at Makaya “You expecting anyone?” She asked ? Kat went to the door and opened it..

“Makaya..” Raif said..
“How about a hello?” Kat said to the handsome stranger. “Perhaps then you would have a chance to see my friend here.”
“I’m very sorry. My name is Raif, I need to see Makaya please.” His dark hazel eyes staring for Makaya to say something, come forward, say his name.
But she remained in her chair.

The reason she remained in her chair was that she was hiding a small bump behind her dress..

“I will leave you two alone for a moment.” Kat left the room before Makaya could beg her to stay.

Raif went over to Makaya still expecting her to stand.
“I twisted my ankle.” She lied.
“Oh are you alright?” He put his hand on her ankles , they didn’t seem swollen or bruised.
“Its not that bad, happened some days ago still sore though.” She looked at him and he longed to kiss her but he didn’t. He sat down in a chair and pulled it over to her.
“Makaya, tell me, what is the matter?” He seemed like a little boy pleading.
“I made many mistakes Raif. I messed up my life so many times, no sense in dragging you along, people will talk and I can’t lose my husband part of him already hates me. I just want you to be happy.” She said wiping away a tear from her face.
“Well, I can handle anything as long as I know you care for me Makaya.” He kissed her cheek.
“But there is many problems Raif and you are younger than me, I can’t rob you of your chances of sewing your wild oats.”
“I don’t care about other women Makaya. I told you that so many times darling.” He closed his eyes as if to will away all this and make her care for him again. He was certain she had stopped caring for him..her arms were not around his neck he felt lost.

“How is your grandmother Raif?” Makaya managed to ask trying hard not to break down and tell him that she was expecting a baby that she believed was his.
“They worry for you.They know how I feel.” He stood up then and smiled, “I told them I want to marry you one day Makaya.” His dark brown eyes somber and sincere.
“Marriage isn’t what one thinks it is Raif.”
“If it is with the wrong mate then perhaps not.” He shook his head. “I don’t understand, we were so happy.” ? “It was an affair Raif and affairs, come to an end.” She was feeling nauscious and suddenly she felt as if she would throw up..
“Makaya, are you alright..” She stood up and ran to the loo…with Kat chasing after her.
Raif could here wretching and he was worried. He called out..”Makaya are you alright?”

Kat came to stand before him, “Why don’t you have a seat Raif and I’ll tell my maid to give you tea.” Kat thought Raif terribly handsome and thought her friend to be foolish to let him slip away so easily.

After she washed her face and changed her clothes, Kat had her slide into bed under the covers. “You have to tell him I don’t like liars girlie.” She kissed Makaya’s cheek, “He has a right to know.” Kat left the bedroom and Makaya put her head in her hands she was terrified. She had wanted a baby so long and now…She was almost certian this child was Raif’s baby.She had had so much problems in the past getting pregnant.

“Come in” she said and she sat up in bed a litte straighter. She smiled as he came closer the dark brown hair the lovely eyes and handsome face. “You are so handsome you devil.” She chided.
“Only to you maybe.” He said and he sat down next to her on the bed.
“Raif, I have to tell you something, I didn’t want to tell you, I didn’t want to burden you, but i think you need to know. I’m pregnant Raif.” She said and she began to cry. He sat there for a moment then grabbed her in his arms.
“Makaya, oh..” His voice trailed off.
“Yes.I am expecting.I think its yours with all my heart I think so.”

“You saw a doctor?” He was concerned
“Yes I did.” She tried to smile.
“I will take responisibility for the child.” He promised.
“Well I don’t know what to do, you see, Michael sent me to Kat’s until I decided what to do. He wants to raise the baby and go on like nothing ever happened.
“We did happen Kay.” He said and he kissed her forhead, “Don’t throw us away.” He put his hand on her belly. “Our baby Kay, just think.” He was excited and proud, he wanted nothing more than to marry Makaya and raise this baby.
“You need to leave him.” Raif stood up anger rising in him now.
“I can’t, There’s Sophie and Arianna, they would be destroyed.” She pleaded
“And what about our baby Kay, do you plan on keeping it away from me?” He was raising his voice and Kat came in now..
“I understand Raif, you are quite upset, but she must rest now, come and I will give you more tea before you leave.” Kat pulled him by the arm, he couldn’t even say goodbye.

Raif’s grandmother sat down by the fireplace her pink shawl wrapped tight around her. “Darling, I know you love her, but you can’t make her leave all that she has known.” Dorthea wanted to soothe her grandson, he was like her very own child. “You must think of what is best for everyone.”
“Whats best is for Makaya to be with me Gran. I love her, he doesn’t love her like I do, he never tells her how beautiful she is or how kind, he spoils her like a child, he doesn’t treat her like a beautiful woman.” He paced the parlor now.
“I know this is difficult for you darling.I wish I could offer some advice. I wish you had not chanced into this affair..” She placed her weathered hands on his strong arm as he walked by her chair. “All you can do is offer your love to her, for a while and if she takes it fine, but don’t wait forever.” She said.
“Alright Gran.” Raif left the parlor, left the house determined to go find Michael and have a man to man talk with him.

Arianna was outside she was upset because Mama was still at Aunt Kat’s it had been 3 months. She was always afraid that Mama would not come back because she was so mean to her mother. The truth was, she loved Makaya. It was a very sad afternoon and seeing Raif ride up did not help.
“Arianna, where is your papa?” Raif asked calmly not wanting to scare the child.
“Why do you want to see my father Sir?” She asked her dark blue eyes glaring at him suspiciously.
“I just want to talk to him.”
“Is it about my Mother?” She questioned, “Do you love her?” She asked.
“She’s a lovely person, I care yes.” He didn’t know what else to say to a 12 year old.
? “Don’t cause trouble with my mother and Father Mr. Raif.” She said and she walked away from him and down the street.

He knocked on the door and Michael answered. Micheal was a handsome man in his own right he had a regal look to him. Raif respected him, yet wondered if that was correct..Could you respect a man whose wife you had taken to bed. He also could not understand why a man in good health and good sense would not wish to bed a beautiful, warm, alluring woman like Makaya every night? Was he blind and heartless ?

“Mr. Hattingtyn. May I please come in?” Raif asked as the older man nodded.
Michael had wanted a chance to have a word with this man.

“She’s very irresponisbile and impulsive, you know. You can’t trust her, she’s like a child in many ways you see…”? “What the hell are you talking about? She is beautiful and kind and funny and warm, yet you only wish to scold her like a child which she is not at all.. The younger Man said.The tension in the room very thick and very real.

“Look, what do you want?” Michael asked sitting down in his chair.? “I want you to let go of Makaya, divorce her.” Raif said
“I will not. What I do with my wife is my buisness.” Michael announced.

“I don’t think you wish to keep her, she is but a mare to your stable a fine creature to admire, let he be free.” Raif prompted.
Michael could have a terrible temper and he was on the verge of breaking the younger man’s neck.

“Let me show you the door Mr. Bentley.” Michael’s dark eyes flashed a warning to the younger man as he made his way to the door. “And when you see her tell her to come home.” Michael said flatly as he closed the door.

The blood on her dress was hot and deadly. Makaya was shaking in fear. Kat was by her side. “Its not good hun.” She had already sent for a doctor. “I think you better send for Raif.” She kissed her friend’s forehead….she was trying to calm her but she feared for the worst.

“I’m only four months Kat, I will lose my baby.” She wailed.
“Its not up to us Makaya, I lost a baby once myself.” Kat hurried to the window to see if Dr. Jansen was going to come or not. “Damn him..Old man.” She muttered. Kat had a note in her hand to Raif and gave it to one of the stable boys..”I want you to get this to him quickly..Ride like hell..” She said and slammed the door after the young man made his way out of the house, It was time Mkaya stopped playing hide and seek and let the man she adored know the truth.

Raif was holding Mkaya in his arms the next day..”Why!” He shouted. “Why!” His black hair was tossled and he was tired he had rode all night to get to her. He had reached to find the woman he loved bleeding almost to death and a dead stillborn baby boy wraped in a blanket. His gut was killing him. He held her to his chest. She was so weak. He let her lay her tear stained face against the pillow and he left the bedroom. Kat handed him tea.

“You know she spent so much of her life feeling unloved, it will take her a while to change the way she thinks Raif.” Kat’s beautiful blue eyes assured him.
“I try to get her to trust me.” He was shaken. “It was a boy.So tiny..so tiny and so much blood..” He shuddered.
“Yes its sad when a wee one doesn’t make it.” Kat shook her head. “I have four myself, they are lovely. They are in Brighton now with my mum for summer.” She smiled, “Go be with her.” Kat said and she left.

Mkaya lay weak and listless. Her mind went to many places. It went back to her childhood in the country. To granny and her warm embrace, to mommy who always loved her but was always fearful..It went to the boys she loved in school, then To Michael who had came to her and told her they would marry, to the first time they had made love and she thought it would be forever, it went to when the children came and to a place where there was so much pain when Michael began to become cold and angry and call her foolish. The tender embraces and passionate kisses lost somewhere in the pain. Her mind came to a clearing to a young man with a handsome smile and a passion she matched..It stayed there and if she died now at that moment it would have to be that way.

He lay next to her as she whimpered in pain, while she cried out for the baby she lost. He bit his bottom lip in anger. He wanted to hurt someone, something ..Damnit. He stood up and his legs ached. He hadn’t slept well in 3 days. He had buried thier son so tiny and said a prayer. He never done anything like that. He had grown up spoiled and pampered, never wanting for anything. He was the youngest of five children and well dotted on. Life had been a beautiful game until he met Mkaya. She had a child like innocence and underneath that a seductress. She had a sweetness and a bitterness..
she was playful and strong, impish and a tigress she was so much he couldn’t describe. ?He watched her sleep it seemed as if she would never wake up, she was fighting for her life in that humble sleep.

Mkaya sat up her body was weak, she held onto Raif’s hand. He had not left her in the one week since she lost their small baby boy. Tears rolled down her cheeks. “you know I wanted that baby Raif, I think God is punishing me for everything I have done.”

“Do you think God would punish you for loving me M?” He kissed her forehead. “It’s nonsense.We love each other. It’s a gift not a curse.” He got up seeing that she was weary and about to fall into slumber. His mind was tired. It was hard seeing someone has vivacious as Mkaya so weak. What  had he done ? He tried to reason with himself  that loving her was a good thing. He had no regrets, he just didn’t know about the future. What if what if…

****

Mkaya left Kat’s house on a Sunday Raif by her side in the carriage they had both stood by the tiny grave and said a prayer for the baby they lost. She didn’t  have much to say, she knew she would have to go back to Jacob’s house. ” I have to go back there for now Raif. My daughters need me, I have been gone so long now, I don’t want to.” She put her hand on his.

“It’s alright I understand.” He tried not to think of her back in that man’s house.”
“Mkaya I know you are afraid, but don’t you think we have been through enough now that you should get a divorce?” He asked her as they rode by a beautiful lake. He knew that Jacob had been her past but he wanted to give her a future. “You just have to do it Mkaya if you want me in your life. I can’t  go on sharing you forever.” He looked at her those brown eyes of his pleading.

She smiled “I will.” She lay her head against his shoulder feeling content that was one thing she always felt with this lovely man.

Kali Bryan was a modern day princess though she was not royal by blood, she had an upbeat personality, loved bling and sort of lived in a fantasy world. It was a thursday afternoon when her car bumped into some guys car. She was sure he would get in trouble because she had caught him on his I-phone.
When the two got out of thier cars she spied a tall, cute guy with glasses it was like Clark Kent had came to town. “You hit me!” She spat. The truth was she was a nervous wreck and hated confrontation. He eyed the damage of her car. “I admit its my fault I was on the phone and I shouldn’t of been.” His soft brown eyes would not pay for the damage of her car and she looked away. “I will call the police.” She said running to her car shaking. It was a tiny bump but she was freaking out. He was back on his phone as if it didn’t even matter. She grabbed her person and ran back to where he stood against his car. He was so  tall and she was tall so he had to be about 6’3 because she was 5’9. She wrinkled her brow at him. Tapping him on the arm, he hung up (however one hangs up an I-phone) and smiled at her. “Let me give me your number and you let me know how much it costs and I’ll try to fix it. I don’t have much money though.” Again the smile and puppy eyes. “Well, I don’t have much money either and I need my car fixed.” She was fuming now. People always said she wasn’t assertive enough so maybe she would practice on him.”What is your name?” She asked suddenly. He produced a bizness card from his back jeans pocket.He had some sexy, exotic name. Taj..”Oh like the Taj Mahal?” She shook her head…”Listen, I need my car fixed. She broke down then crying like a wuss, what she had fought so hard not to do. Taj was annoyed, he had a meeting to go to so he shoved his card at her again and said “Call me…” He hadn’t even asked her name. How arrogant! He did however ask out the car window…”Are you gonna be able to drive?” But she flipped him off, she just couldn’t think of anything else to do. To be continued

It was always the same for Cortlin she was always there at the pub. She wanted attention so she began to sang and dance only to have her mother grab her by the ears and pull her away from whatever she was doing.

“I won’t have ya dancing like whore in me pub Corti.” Mama would say but Cort would go back to dancing when the music would start and the fellows would drop money into the jar she had sat on papa’s bar.

She was 19 and the menfolk had started to ask about her “Availability” Her father had said she wasn’t ready for settleing down and her mother would only hold her hand over her chest in answer. Being bored with the pub and singing and dancing Cortlin asked her folks if she could start her own little shop. She liked to make jewelry out of simple things she would collect. Buttons, beads, charms.

“It’s a fine idea lass, but we don’t the money to start you a store.” Papa said, but before a month was over he had portioned a part of the pub off to make her a tiny little corner to sell her things. She was thrilled. The problem was it was mostly men in the pub. Sometimes. Women would come in to eat stew or a sandwich. She had to somehow draw the women in. For now she was happy with her tiny corner of the pub where Papa had put two large shelves and a counter to stand behind…He had lots of friends and wherever they got the things that now made her own little corner of the world she was very greatful.

Dressed in long trousers the color of faded red roses and a white peasant blouse that hung off one of her shoulders she looked lovely. Her black hair was cut short almost like a boys and her deep blue eyes were mischievous as ever. The pub was busy and she could smell Mama’s lamb stew cooking slowly on the stove and everynow and them someone laughed loudly. It was a late Sunday afternoon when he came into the pub.

She couldn’t see him because she was in her corner, but she could hear a different accent. It wasn’t Irish. She had heard other people’s way of talking because they were passer-bys and travelers. She heard a very nice voice, a manly, handsome voice. She didn’t want to leave her little shop because Gabrielle De’mons was holding one of her baubles. Gabby was fancy she was French and her family had moved to Ireland just because they could…Cortlin was agitated because she wanted to see the man who was talking to her father. “OH !” Gabby let out and put the earrings back on the counter..

“Yazid! Come !” She grabbed her cousin by the arm. In a moment Cortlin was staring at a handsome, tall young man with soft eyes and dark hair and beautiful dusky skin. He was wearing a black light jacket a dark blue sweater and gray slacks. He smiled at Cortlin.

“Cortlin this is my cousin Yazid from Algeira
Algieria is in North Africa.” She said excitedly.

“Oh…Hello. I don’t think we have had anyone from North Africa in our wee pub so welcome.” She stepped out and shook his hand. She was that way with everyone. He smiled at her a warm, boyish smile.

“Nice to meet you.” Yazid’s brown eyes fell on the fair skinned Irish girl with the big blue eyes. She was smiling with deep dimples. Why was she so happy? His cousin put down money for 3 pairs of earrings. “

“Cortlin, this is beautiful…I like all your things, make more and I will buy!” She kissed her on the cheek and dragged the tall young man out of the small corner. She stared after them.

Later at home she pulled out the encyclopedia and read about Algeria. She took notes so if she met Yazid again she could talk to him about his country. Mama was staring at her. “What are you doing?” Mama came and lifted up the heavy encyclopedia.

“I’m learning about Algiera” She said excitedly.
“Oh you are are ya?” Mama asked her eyebrow lifting. “Who is it you are studying this for?” Mama sat down on her small bed. Cortlin’s face was burning.
“Gabbie’s cousin is from there, he is so tall mama and handsome and….” The look on her mother’s face stopped her.

“You don’t chase foreign boys. I won’t have you running off to some far away place.” She blew her a kiss and walked away. Cortlin shook her head, and went back to the encyclopedia.

The Next day she went to Gabbie’s house. It was a nice house not far from the pub. In her purse she carried a few new pendants she had made. This visit was so she could lay her eyes on her handsome forgiegn boy again. She knocked on the door and Gabbie’s Mother opened. “Ah, Cortlin, how are you? Come in!” Her mother seemed to be excited, but Cortlin thought it was all for show , how could she be that excited to see her? She walked inside and spied Yazid at the dinner table he was reading a book. He looked up and then rose from his chair. He came to greet her.

“Hello.” She said
“Hi.” He was looking at her and he liked her smile.
“My cousin told me more about you.” He said with a smile.
“Well, what did she say?” Cortlin’s lips sort of puckered. “Maybe, I should be worried?” Cortlin smiled
“No need to be worried, she said you liked to sing in the pub.” He moved away and motioned for her to come inside for they had been standing in the doorway.
“Yes, I do. I get bored over at the pub so every now and then Ilike to sing some.” She hugged Gabby when she came inside. Gabby was lovely with blonde hair and a dainty figure. Maybe, Gabby was her only friend in town she suddenly realized.

They went into the parlor and Yazid followed they sat on a large sofa and he sat in an arm chair across from them. He looked down every now and then and Cortlin wondered if he was shy.

“Tell me about your country. Is it Yazid? I like your name its pretty.” She said smiling.
“Pretty? No one ever said that he laughed.”
“Well, I like it. I really do.” She blushed.
“Thanks.” He said. “Its pretty boring compared to your name.
“Oh Cortlin? I don’t know where mom got that name. I don’t like it at all!” She said loudly then covered her mouth and giggled.
Gabby coughed…”And what about me, what about my name? “ She chided.
“Oh Gabby everything about you is perfect.” Cortlin smiled.

Yazid excused himself and left the two ladies to talk. He was restless. He was glad to get of the homeland and see some of the world, but he was worried about their home in Biskra that his father had just turned over to him. It was his yet, he was far away and unable to build it up the way he had dreamt since he was old enough to dream. He could feel Cortlin’s eyes on him and he was a bit uneasy. She was as warm as a desert wind in summer. She had this aura about her. He went back to his cousin and her friend.

“Well, I hate to go, but my folks need me to keep that pub alive.” She smiled and went to the door. “Tell your mum I said bye and thank her for the tea.” She looked at Yazid. “Yazid, take care of yourself.” She patted his arm and left.

Cortlin was smitten. It was obvious and she spent a lot of her time in the corner daydreaming. It was when her parents said that she must continue to do most of the pub work and only pay attention to her “Shop” when someone mentioned it. So she was back to bussing tables and singing and feeling foolish. She daydreamed of Yazid and his faraway land when she caught a moment.

He came into the pub with his books. He didn’t drink said it was not because of his religion alone, but that he preferred juice. So she would give him orange juice and ask him what book he was reading and try to hang around him as much as she could. Her parents made faces, but after a few days they realized that Cortlin had a crush on the young man from far and decided to leave her alone.

Yazid invited Cortlin for a walk and she went. It was nice to be outside and away from the pub.

“You like being with your parents?” He asked and she realized again she loved his accent it was so different somewhat French and yet she giggled and begged him to speak some Arabic to her. She loved everything he said and he smiled at her. They would walk and talk for hours.

Cortlin lay in her bed at night and thought about kissing Yazid. It would be a nice kiss they were both tall and so she imagined him kissing her and then what she didn’t know exactly. She never wanted him to leave this tiny town of hers.

Gabby announced that she was going to have a small party over at her home and Cortlin jumped at the chance to come. “Oh, it will be great Gab. We can have music and food and well it’s going to be great! “ Cortlin imagined wearing her dark blue dress and dancing with Yazid. He had told her the other day that he was willing to learn to dance.

“Corti do you like my cousin?” Gabby was sitting in the chair near the door at the pub and thankfully the music her father had playing was quite loud. She took a sip of tea. “ Yes. I like him. He’s tall, he’s cute. I wish he was mine.” She blushed. “But don’t you go telling him anything like this!” Cortlin grabbed Gabbie’s hand. “I mean it Gabbie, because I don’t have luck with guys and you know it.” She pleaded.

“Well, I think he likes you too. Why would he come over here everyday to go walking with you if he didn’t?” Gabbie’s voice was full of excitement.

“Ah Gabby, he’s just bored is why he comes over here. There is not a lot going on here and we keep each other good company.”

“Whatever, but I think he likes you too my dear.” And she took a sip of tea and they both broke out in giddy laughter.

A young man in town had his eyes set on Cortlin.He had wanted her for a long time but kept quite until now. He didn’t like the way she was all smiles with the tall man from far. He was not local either. he was born and raised in Istanbul and had came to Ireland for sheer leisure and had not yet been able to go back to Istanbul. He had spoken to Cortlin many times and yet he had hurt her feelings over and over. She begged for love and he begged for her body and it seemed neither would give what the other wanted. Now, he was walking to her outside the pub.

Cortlin’s pulse quickened when she saw Serkan. He was devilishly handsome and something about him just upset her to the very bone. She walked faster. “Cortlin, wait I want to talk to you.” He was next to her now with those sharp dark eyes and raven hair. He wore a silver hoop in his ear and she shook her head. He looked like a handsome pirate.

“I know you said you don’t want to talk to me, but I think we can be friends. I want to get to know you better.” He touched her hand.

“You knew me a year, Serkan, and when I said I liked you what did you do? You ran off. Just leave me alone alright.” She was upset and she stopped to sit at a small picnic table. He sat down across from her. ” I know I have been a bad guy. I have been mean to you, but I have changed. I like you so much.” His hand reached out to hers but she pulled it away. She felt lost around Serkan, he was one of the first guys that had ever stirred her desires. She wanted him to get away now though but his hand was on hers again.

Yazid saw Cortlin and for some reason seeing her talking to another man unnerved him. It was also her body language she was tense. In a few strides he was standing next to the picnic table….He didn’t even think he just reacted as his fist hit the other man in the face. “OH GOD!” Cortlin explained she knelt down to check Serkan. “Why did you do that?” She asked shocked.

“Wasn’t he bothering you?” He asked her in a tone of voice that didn’t seem to be too concerned. Serkan held his jaw as he stood up. He looked at Cortlin. “I will see you later.” And walked away. Cortin was left with Yazid and she was shaking. ” I may not care much for him, but you didn’t have to knock his lights out!” She ran off towards the pub. Yazid shook his head. “Oh well.” He murmured and his fist hurt a little.

Cortlin was at the pub, in her little corner. She was daydreaming about things and wishing she was in a far away land, Yazid would be on a horse and come riding towards her…

“Girl, when does the dishes get done around here?” Mama asked bringing her out of the Sahara dessert. “Oh. I forgot all about that. She put the few boxes of goods away and walked to the front of the pub. She was really wanting outside because it was a lovely day and all. She saw Yazid with his book near the window he gave her a smile and she blushed. She couldn’t be angry at him for long. He was the only real male friend she had ever had to talk to. She was going to go over to him, but her mother grabbed her by the arm.

“There is work darlin…” Her mother gave Yazid a small smile, he was handsome that was a fact.

After the dishes were done. Cortlin went outside to walk with Yazid it was near dinner time.

“I will going back to my country soon Cortlin.” He said looking at her with those soft puppy eyes.She stood still. “Oh..” was all she could say before the tears started down her cheek. He caught one with his thumb.

“Why are you crying?” She lay her head against his chest. She sobbed he put his arm around her. He never expected her to react this way.

“I don’t want you to go Yazid. I love you.” She said suddenly. She didn’t even hear the words they just came so free from her and it was the truth.

“You love me?” He asked with a smile. “How can you love me Cortlin?” He urged her over to the small park bench..”Sit down and dry your tears.” He handed her a hankie.

“I just love you Yazid.If you don’t like it I can’t help it. I just do.” She put her head in her hands.” He touched her soft dark hair. “Now, calm down Corti.” He hadn’t called her Corti before,but he had heard others close to her call her that and it felt right at the moment.

“Well, I have to tell you something. I think I love you too though I don’t really know what love is.” He smiled and removed his glasses. She peered at him with a weak smile.

“You do?” No man had ever said he loved her before. She threw her arms around him.

“Relax, it doesn’t mean we are going to get married and have a gang of kids or anything.” He laughed.

“Okay.” She said still looking at his face that she adored. Was he going to kiss her ? Didn’t people kiss after they said they were in love? But He stood up. ” Let me walk you home. I have to leave early in the morning.” He took her by the hand then. He didn’t want to go, because he didn’t know if he would ever see this lovely angel again. He should not of told her he loved her but something about that moment, her tears and her lovely face had made him feel safe in saying the truth.

The day Yazid left for Algeria he kissed Cortin on the cheek and boarded the train that would take him farther away to a ship. She sobbed quietly and they both promised to write one another. Her mother left her alone  to cry in here room the rest of the day. She had no interest in the pub or her little shop. Life had been so boring before Yazid. he brought with him so much. He was tall, handsome his skin was a lovely tan. He was so lovely and warm and made her heart skip. Now, he was gone. She wondered if he would forget her. It seemed as if her world had turned upside down. She went to Gabby for comfort.

“I really don’t know much about him. We are related yes, but I never knew him much growing up. I know he likes you Cortin he told me.” Gabby was at the piano playing away. Cortlin said goodbye and went for a walk. Serkan came along and looked almost afraid.

“Don’t worry Yazid went back to Algeria.” She said sadly.

“AH! Some good news!” He  didn’t say anything else he just walked away. Cortlin went to the pub and her mood was foul. Her father was smiling and she slammed the kitchen door. She didn’t want to see a smile or hear a cheerful song not when someone she loved was gone.

***

Back in Algeria Yazid was busy with his family. They had no clue about the beautiful girl he had left back in Ireland. TBC