indescribable

Sunday, Aug. 1st 2010

It had been a great love and Serephina had loved Yazid with a great tender passion. He had left her lying under the cabanna somewhere in the Sahara. His lean fingers on her cheeks his dark brown eyes staring into her blue ones.

“Don’t leave me..” She whispered sweat forming on her delicate alabastor forehead.

“I’ll be back for you, my men are here , they will protect you.” His sensual lips searched out hers and they kissed.

Hours later she was alone in a villa overlooking the sea. She was longing for the love of Yazid, he was so much a part of her, but she felt like she would never fully possess him. He didn’t speak much sometimes she blamed it on the language difference his arabic-english ratio was still Arabic in the forefront. They spoke in other ways though and she never loved anyone like him.

The fact that he had left her at the cabanna had unnerved her. She didn’t want him away from her. As soon as he left the men who were suppossed to protect her came and tried to be her heroes. she was afraid. They feared Yazid’s fists and stayed away, but their eyes told her she was in danger.She was a foreigner in his land, they had met in South africa and had exchanged glances. He seemed shy but she had seen him laughing with his friends outside and knew he wasn’t that shy.

She had came outside in the hot summer air wearing a dark blue evening gown looking like an angel with black hair and blue eyes she smiled at him and he was quiet. He was tall 6’4 with dark eyes and black wavy hair.She smiled at him. “Is it always so beautiful out here?” He smiled back. “yeah.” He walked towards her and she pulled her shawl near her. “My name is Serafina, but you can call me Sera.” She held out a hand and he kissed it.

“You shouldn’t be out here at night you know plenty of lions and tigers..” He warned her.

“Well, won’t you protect me?” She asked her cheeks turning pink.
“Nah, I don’t wanna die.”
She shook her head and laughed loudly.
“Shhh, the tigers will get you and carry you off.” He teased.
“I know you will save me..what’s your name my hero?”
“Yazid.” He said
“That’s pretty.” She ran her hand through her short hair.
“Why is your hair so short?” He asked.
“I hate long hair its a bother.” She walked closer. He was so tall she felt small at 5’9 and that made her feel good because she always felt bigger than everyone else.
“Go back inside.” He told her.
“Why?” She batted her eyelashes at him.
“Don’t ask me why go inside.” He held up his hand and suddenly pushed her inside and followed her.
“There’s tigers out there woman!” He snarled
She somehow wanted to cry because his words were harsh.She also felt protected because he pulled her to the window and out that window into the dark a patch of orange and black passed by.
“Oh my God!” She gasped.
“I could feel it.” He said and I wasn’t about to be it’s dinner and you its desert.”
She put her arms around his neck and he was shocked by the warmth in his culture women didn’t grab men and hug them like this.
“Oh God, you saved me..” She panted.
He held her a moment then let her go “It was nice meeting you. I will be here for a few days if you want to talk.” And he left her after locking the door of the small inn that belonged To sheik Alum. Shiek Alum was a friend of her uncle’s and that is how she had came to south africa. She had met him and for a week followed him like a pup around the small elegant Inn. They talked, they went for long walks and she lost her heart.

After South Africa she followed him to his homeland of Algeria, she worked as a nurse’s aid at a hospital and she lived alone in a hospital apartment. They had made love with a passion she had not known , she had been married before to Alexander for 10 years and never had she felt so intense, so in love.

They spoke of marriage, but she knew his parents feelings they knew of her but she was not allowed to come to their house. Now, that they didn’t know where she was because he had hidden her. She was crying often because he was seeming to drift when he had been by her side hours of loving, playing, laughing, arguing, getting back together.. Now, she didn’t know.

Somewhere out side he was here in his birthplace. She touched the air with her hands..”Where is my Yazid?” She asked the wind that touched her warmly.

At night she locked her bedroom door and pushed heavy furniture against the door. She was afraid one of her “Protectors” Would get lonely and bother her.

How many days could someone be lonley like this ? How many hours had to pass..she would cry for him. One day she decided to pack her things and she went to the door.

“I want out. I want to go back to America.” She said with a defiant tear.

“Sir won’t like it.” A skinny teenager with a smile said.
“I don’t care. I am leaving today, drive me to the train station.” She demanded. These men knew how strong minded this woman could be they had witnessed the arguements between their boss and his lady love and it could be loud.

“We can not let you go, we have to protect you, when Sir comes back you can go.” The boy assured her.

She was angry. She wanted to shove him, but she sat down in one of the plush chairs in the parlor to think for a while.

She could not stay here. She could not keep eating and drinking and sleeping loneliness.

Three days later Yazid arrived with much fanfare. The people who worked at the house whopped and hollered and he laughed and spoke in Arabic and they carried his suitcases upstairs. She would not run down to him she sat on the large four poster bed unmoving. He entered the room and seeing here there remained still. He always fought his emotions around her. He told her he would.He said he loved her but he was stubborn. He didn’t swoop her up in his arms.
“Come.” He ordered softly.
“How long has it been Yazid 2 months or 3 tell me ?” She asked.
He went to her and held a box. “I brought you something so open it please before I throw it out the window…”
She knew he would do that. She stood up. Her eyes locked on his
“I won’t kiss you.” He said.
“I don’t care.” She bit her bottom lip and took the box. She opened it it was wrapped in red shiny paper with a black ribbon it was small and she opened it ..Inside the box was a ring a silver ring with a black stone, an onyx the shape of a heart with some filagree work on the side.
“It’s beautiful.” She said. She was afraid to move though because he was unpredictible. He could walk out or he could hold her. She knew he hadn’t liked it that when he walked in she had been cold.
She blinked back tears.
“You missed me I know it.” He grabbed her up in his arms and kissed her. She sank into his skin like a leach burying into the blood of a wounded animal. They made love for hours and she fell asleep in his arms.

For a few days they were happy again. Having breakfast on the beautiful veranda, laughing , kissing and then he said he was going to leave again.

“I can’t do it anymore, I have to go home.”She said bitterly as he was packing his suitcase.

“You won’t ?” He said one thick dark eyebrow raised.

“Why are you leaving me again!” She shook her fist at him..”Are your parents trying to marry you off…what is it?” She spat.

“No one can marry me off, I will be with who I chose.” He reminded her.

“Well, I don’t know if you are ever going to chose me, and as much as I wish you would I can’t keep being this house guest.” She shook her head.

“Just a week I promise.I won’t stay away long and when we come back I will take you to a lovely place and you will like it.” He kissed her forhead.

“Zee (she called him Zee for short) I need to go home for a while to my family. I need to see my mother.” She said her blue eyes telling him it was the truth.

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Summer Heat (a Very short romance story)

Monday, Jul. 26th 2010

Shawna Hawkins sat by the pool she was hot and tired. The july sun beat down on her and she reached for a cold drink from the small cooler next to her lounge chair. This vacation was a total bore. Her Uncle had given her a free vacation for her 30th birthday and she just sat by the pool feeling tense and bored. When she saw him walk out of the hotel she almost gasped because he was lovely like some greek God. A six pack, black hair and olive skin. She took a quick sip of water. She was blushing when he took the chair next to hers oh how lucky was she?
“HI.” He said grinning.
“Hi.” She turned her head and bit her thumb.
After a long silence he spoke.
“Are you hear for vacation?” He had a deep husky voice.
“Yes, I am trying to relax but I don’t know how.” She looked at him and smiled wearily her face was burning and it was not from the sun.
She noticed long thick lashes and the eyes were a deep blue not brown. She was staring.
“I’m Nick. I came here from Russia.” He said with a bit of an accent.
“OH. I’m just Shawna from Ohio.” She said looking at her hands oh no she needed a manicure she hid them behind her back.
“Well, Shawna from Ohio how can I help you relax, do you know i can give a great massage.” He smiled.
“Oh you do?’ she began to fidget in the lounge chair.
“Yes, may I?” He was already getting up and she found herself turning over.
“oh..” She said feeling drops of oil land on her back like warm rain drops from a forbidden rain forest.
His hands were strong but gentle. No one had ever given her a massage like this and he was gorgeous. He had to be gay she argued with herself otherwise why would he bother with her anyway.

She ran her hands through her auburn bob and closed her eyes.
“Relax, beautiful.” He murmured.
She could feel herself become what she shouldn’t be and she figured this wouldn’t last long and she could go back to her room and rent a pizza…maybe a veggie one tonight…only one slice.

“You have a beautiful back, beauty.” He said rubbing her back in circular motions.

“Oh…ah…Thank you.” She moved under his expert hands like putty.She was lost her eyes closed she pretended..

“I want to be alone with you beauty..Can we go to your room..” He whispered.

She thought about this invite. She didn’t know him and although he was gorgeous her mind flash forwarded to a few different things.

* He could make wild love to her
*He could possibly murder her with a blunt object
*He could still be gay and only using her for an experiment

“No, but thank you for the massage.” She said and as he walked away he shook her head, she just didn’t feel right about it,but the massage was awesome!!

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Coney Island trip

Saturday, Jul. 24th 2010

Today was the first time I ever went to Coney Island. I was really amazed at the crowd. The board walk was long with nice hotdog stands, chicken, fish, kebabs and more, the cotton candy looked so festive. The weather was so hot and we went to the bathrooms to change. The bathrooms were so crowded, the lady inside was yelling “Ladies move along!” I was trying to put my bathing suit on without getting my feet on the floor as it was wet but they did try to mop , but still it was a struggle living in India has helped me to deal with crowds and less than clean conditions. On the beach I sat down on a towel while the kids ran to the ocean. I am afraid of deep water, but after a while I went down and put my feet in the ocean the water was very cold I could see sea wood float towards us. The beach was pretty dirty with broken glass here and there and many food containers empty. I was disappointed by that, because The USA beaches should be cleaner than this. After an hour on the beach we went to the amusement park called Luna Park I really enjoyed the teacup ride but kids were staring at me and I meant to enjoy that because it was the only ride I was going to deal with …I enjoyed it and wouldn’t mind to go. I think my favorite part was riding in the teacup and having a Nathan’s hot dog with Chili fries.When we were leaving the moon looked so beautiful smiling low over the Atlantic.

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Is face book just a slap in the face?

Thursday, Jul. 22nd 2010

Sometimes, I think Face book is a slap in the face. I remember the first time someone removed me from their friends list. There was a pain in my stomach. When my aunt removed me I cried, I had heard she didn’t like that I had marital problems and that I dared speak about it on facebook. Things haven’t been the same with my aunt since. Often, people are not going to say look, I think we would get along better outside this little fake utopia. They just go down the list of friends and delete you. You notice one day that you don’t get news feeds about them anymore and then you type in their name and you see “Add as a friend” and you are really bummed. I really look at it as rejection like back in high School. Some people have no clue what an impact this rejection holds. I deleted one of my friends because I couldn’t stand who he was dating, I was just angry and in my anger I deleted him. He still won’t talk to me and as I write this article, I try to put across we can not judge our life and soul on our facebook popularity folks. If you feel slapped, you surely must know this person, to have been added, write them an email and say look, did you take me off your list on purpose ? Sometimes its a glitch I have seen that happened.If they say “yes.” find out why and maybe you just cut ties all together, I think this happens, if someone can’t let you be on a list of names and let you be part of their internet social circle do they want you in real life ? Think about it, and just remember you are special even if they didn’t add you as a friend there are other friends to be made out there in both worlds the real world and the cyber one.

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When its over

Thursday, Jul. 22nd 2010

I don’t know what I did. I don’t know why he doesn’t talk to me anymore. I have a pain deep inside my heart and I don’t know how he could do this to me. I know there will be more tears, I want to heal. I loved someone online he was my friend, we said we loved one another.I sent him stuff and He was the one I told everything to now he’s no where around he has no time for me, I said I can’t be friends anymore. I don’t know how someone could do this to me, how could someone know you love them and stay away from you? This is my true story it is happening now and I am so sad, there is a hole in my heart, you think fate has brought you someone who really loves you for you, you share so much and one day they just stop talking, how do we cope , we are so far we can’t follow them down the street and demand an answer, we built this site together, we talked, we planned and now he has no time for me, if you are suffering pleases feel free to write in with your story. Margo

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Make up trends :)

Wednesday, Jul. 21st 2010

I love makeup and I spend a lot of time buying, writing about, wearing or talking about it. There are some really interesting products out there right now that are very light weight and interesting. One thing I am loving is smash box’s O glow intuitive cheek color, it goes on clear but turns pink like you are a girl in love. I love it for its innocent look, but have a tissue with you the first few times because you may put too much and you don’t want to look like a clown even if you are a cute clown ..other than that, I think it is an awesome new product and I get such a kick out of it going on clear and turning pink…Check out out at sephora.com or smashbox.com or read about it on my other blog, www.onlinemakeuppreviews.com. m

he made you blush or did O glow ?

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Its so hot !

Wednesday, Jul. 21st 2010

I’m not a heat person, give me about 76 degrees and I’m happy I don’t like being in a boiling vat of humidity. I lived in India before and some days I was so drained, I didn’t care about anything. I think right now I wish I could dive into a glass of ICE TEA and forget all my troubles. How do you deal with heat ?

Share your story !

looking cool but ...ugh

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Share your stories

Sunday, Jul. 18th 2010

I would to hear your stories of how distance has affected your life, do you love some one far away ? I don’t just mean a boyfriend girlfriend..your mother , your grandma anyone, please tell us your story ! Thanks margo

I just want to go

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Working my way down

Wednesday, Jul. 14th 2010

Join me in a weight loss journey. I have been overweight most of my life and I know what a hell it can be to give up , to get hope and then one night get hungry and back to the same ol same. I am here to say that we can do it. We can lose the weight. The main thing is to keep it off. Also, I want to say there is nothing wrong in being a big girl, I love being a sexy, full figured beauty, but the main thing is I feel my health is suffering because now I got myself diabetes. I don’t want on shots. I want to try to fight some. So tonight I thought I would add to my blog the weight loss window. I would love for anyone to join me on this journey post stories and pics and lets help each other keep motivated !!

watch it go down!!!!!!

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I just want to say

Wednesday, Jul. 14th 2010

* I am real

Kelly ann closed her lap top and looked out the window. People often talked about the outside world, versus the cyber world. But the cyber world was where she and Jake had lived, loved, fought, made up. She was lost without Jake. He was her everyday for a year and a half. He seemed to be withdrawn and told her he was busy when he used to say “lets talk”. She had sent him too many messages and the common friends they shared had went to Jake saying she was in bad shape…she had been. She loved him.She hated herself for sending him a multitude of messages from “You are cheating on me.” to “You don’t love me” or “Just tell me the truth!!!!” She sobbed in those messages because now she was afraid he was going to hate her. He knows me she would say he knows how I am when I feel insecure, I hope he won’t think I’m a wacko…She was a woman in love with a man far away they had so much against them. Different countries, different everythings. He was her best friend along with Arianne. They had so many fun times on the computer and on the phone distance had been nothing. But now he was so far that she couldn’t hold him and let him gaze into her blue eyes that had poured out tears. To him, maybe he was busy, maybe he thought it no big deal to go days without talking but Kelly was wounded. Her own husband and she didn’t talk much. She had felt that she was in a marriage because she had married too young, and because of the kids she was stuck. But with Jake she could talk and laugh and there was an attraction there. He had played with some girls online and she cringed thinking he had told them he loved them. She wondered how his love for her differed for that he professed for them. She somehow felt she had won out those times, but still she hated that he had told them he cared. She didn’t want Jake to be a player, in a way he wasn’t. But she didn’t want love as a word she wanted it as much as dying man wanted to see his fondest lover one more time it was urgent. Now, She was alone at home so far from Jake. She had an active mind, and thirsted for things to keep her mind occupied. She knew some how she had to meet Jake in real life, past the wires, and touch him. What if he didn’t want her anymore? She had went online last night and one of the bad guys was on trying to get her to send pics. She was disgusted. There was no intellect behind these people, there were no care they only wanted to get off and she was filled with a venom for them. She was so much more than a photo she had depth and a fire of a personality. Jake had seen it. He had accepted it. He told her the other day in one of their 2 minute skype convos that she had better change somethings and that had been 2 spears to the chest. Why was he wanting her to change ? When he had loved her as she was taken a broken shell and glued it back together. What was going on with them? At night she tried to not think of him, but she did. He had made her happy to feel loved and wanted. She could have another man, she knew it but Jake was all she had ever wanted in a guy and this was important to her. She cursed herself for loving him yet it had happened naturally. They had talked hours and hours, and now he said he had no time for talk. She had a dream that her tonsils had to be removed and she felt that was in a way telling her she had to be silenced. “I need more time.” She had told the doctor on the other end of the phone. Strange dreams that also had been about being in a crowded party at an elderly ladies house people were celebrating and she was on a sofa with people she didn’t know. She had looked out the window and there was a beautiful view of the woods and lush green and she had said to the man on the sofa next to her, “He must have loved her a lot to buy her this place.” Outside she had walked and there were brown flowers which fell from the heavy tree limbs and she worried if they were dead but something told her they were alive and this was their color. She had woke up and called Arianne. “It’s another day.” She said and rolled around on her bed. She closed her eyes and tried to imagine some romance, but no face would come to her mind. Just Jake and his glasses and his scowl. She didn’t want to type to him or do anything but she picked up her phone and texted…”I just want to say I love you.”

m

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